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I feel like there are many different viewpoints on this topic. I have lots of friends who have no problem leaving their kids for either short or long trips without them. Then I have friends who have never left their kids for an overnight. There’s no right or wrong way, I’m just trying to figure out the best way to approach trips now that I have three kids.
Usually, we have grandparents who are more than willing to take our kids (and our dog!). This was when there was just 1 little one or 2 big kids. But now we have three total and I feel like it’s a lot to ask. They often insist, but still, I know how much work they are!
I’d love to hear how you all manage trips away from your kids. Do you have parents that help? Do you hire sitters? Thanks!
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Today, I heard of a parent allowing their only child, who is 8, to travel across the country for 3 weeks with an Aunt. I can't imagine my kids ever wanting to do that, let alone me allowing it.
However, I guess that we all have different tolerances and ideas about parenting.
As a grandmother, I enjoy taking my grandkids for overnights and an occasional weekend. Since it is very tiring, I do not know how I would do if I had them for a week's vacation.
However, I plan to take 3 of my grandkids for a week in a few months. We worked it out so that it is during school so that I would have a break during the day. On the weekend, the kids will have a playdate to give me another break. That is very considerate, and I appreciate the planning that has gone into the visit to accommodate my energy level.
I hope that it works out for you!
My mom always welcome the idea of us having to leave our kids to her. We are lucky in this aspect because my husband and I can go on a trip without worrying. Because we are sure that our kids are being taken care of and they are having a great time with grandma as well.
The thing though is, when we are on a vacation, my husband and I terribly miss our kids. On vacations, our topic will always be the kids, we shop around for the kids, and on the last day of our vacation, we are usually in a hurry to go home and be with our kids. So, we decided to take the kids when going on a vacation and just go out for dinner or movies for our mommy and daddy time.
We just want to enjoy our time together without being away to our kids and I think this has been the best decision we made as a couple.
My mother has been the biggest support for me. I am a full time working mom and my work involves occasional visits to other cities. My kids were quite comfortable staying with their grandmother from a very young age.
Now that our kids are older, it has become a lot easier. We, my husband and I, make sure that our out of city official visits are scheduled in a way that one of us is at home with kids.
I agree, there is no right or wrong answer to this question. It is quite subjective and depends on what works best for you. For me it has worked really well. My kids have become more responsible and empathetic. I have experienced that taking children on board makes a real difference. I have always explained to them why I have to go away, for how long and I always stay in touch with them.
I have grappled with the same issue having a need to occasionally work away for work. Luckily my husband will take the reigns and care for our daughter when I have to go away and likewise, I'll take the single role when my husband has to go away. When we are both needed to be away we have a wonderful daycare lady that will provide us extended support if we ever need. This is quite an unusual set up for some daycares, however, we only access her sparingly as we have no family or friends close enough to assist. My mother friends also tell me about accessing nannies on rare occasions when they too are needing extra support.
From a young age, my kids loved having overnight visits with their grandparents. It gave them the opportunity to feel comfortable with stays away from home and taught them that there are other adults that they can turn to if they need help. At one point, my son (at about age 4) would pack his bag and insist that he wanted to spend the night at his grandparents. These short visits made it much easier for me to leave my kids for a few days when I needed to travel for business or if my husband and I wanted a weekend away.
Later on, as a divorced parent, it was necessary for me to establish new "trust networks" so that I could travel when required. I have found that it is always easier if the kids can stay in their own environment because that way they are used to the space and the routine and are less likely to play up. In most instances, Ive relied on a trusted family member to keep an eye on the kids, but if this was not possible, then my kids have on occasion stayed with their best friends' families - but for no longer than 2 nights in these instances.
It can be so difficult, especially if you have to travel for work. If your parents or in-laws are willing sitters but your brood is a bit of a handful, then consider adding a sitter or au pair to the mix who can help out with some of the daily child-related tasks such as running them to their after school activities, helping with homework, and lending a hand while dinner is being prepared.