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As an unexpected single mom, I could be doing as many as three different jobs to make ends meet. This is in addition to keeping the house clean, cooking meals, preparing lunches, being the chauffeur, helping with homework and projects, and managing our daily lives. With all of these responsibilities, how do you find quality time to spend with your kids?
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Well done on you for doing a huge job as a single mum! I think the quality time that children feel with their parents is when they are feeling heard and seen. If this means engaging with them while you do chores together (even if they may take a bit longer to get done!), this is when kids' cups gets filled up.
You could also make special rituals with each child that help you get your own chores done, such as a special song you have together to put the washing away, or a special morning hand shake for each child or special jobs for each one. All of these small things can feel like quality time for your kids and can take the stress of adding something 'else' to do in your day.
These are all wonderful suggestions! I think the idea of making Saturday a fun day every week is a great rule to institute! If this time becomes a predetermined "sacred" time for your fun family time together, it will become a regular part of your routine. Even if it is dinner out at Mcdonald's due to a heavy day of kids' sporting activities, your children (and you) will cherish this time together.
You must be exhausted, so another idea is Friday movie and pizza night. I know that we working parents (and single parents) are "done in" by Friday night. Relaxing around the TV with pizza can be a tradition that the whole family will love. Easy for you, and time together as a family makes this a win-win idea.
You are doing a super job! Your children will remember you for your many contributions to the family, whether it is fun, work, or any other life duties.
You are an amazing and super mom. Your kids are so lucky to have such dedicated and loving mother to look up to.
First thing I want to say is that YOU are precious. Your health and wellbeing matters the most, because your whole family depends on you. Look again at your routine, please make sure that you take out few moments (at least 20 – 30 minutes) for yourself. Just sit silently and be with yourself. Meditate or listen to music or do whatever helps you relax.
As for sneaking in some quality time with kids, well on my busiest days I try to involve kids with me as partners in doing daily chore and that time becomes a work-joy combo for us. You can listen to their stories of school while preparing a meal together. While cleaning the living room you can discuss how you all want to spend the weekend.
Having a family outing in a nearest national park or beach can help you refresh and feel more close to your kids. A mother once shared with me that leaving notes (in lunchboxes, on refrigerator, on the dining table etc.) while she was away for work, always made children feel as she was nearby.
Take care, more power to you.
Can i just say that you are amazing! I am not a single parent and am in awe of those that handle life as a single parent and manage to work. Whilst i can't offer any advice specific to your situation, I am a full-time working mum of 7 and there are a few things i have learned to make life a bit easier.
1. it really does take a village. If you don't have a support network of family and friends then actively work to create one for yourself. These connections are so invaluable.
2. You don't have to do it all. It's ok to say no sometimes and even though a tidy house is the goal, its ok if there are weeks when its a mess.
3. I make sure i get out of the house with the kids on weekends because if i stay home i will always find another job to do. Saturdays are for fun and Sunday afternoons are for prep work for the week.
4. Self care is essential and entirely unselfish. Try not to feel guilty about doing things for yourself. You need to have good personal wellbeing to be the best parent you can be.
Best of luck and your kids are lucky to have such a dedicated parent.