My kids don’t get along. What can I do?

Siblings can be so different from one another. It is hard when they have such different personalities and interests and yes...all siblings will fight at times. I think that if we focus on the values of being kind and respectful then that can help with treating others in nice ways regardless of whether or not they are our friends or siblings. You might find that as they grow older they find more in common again but just bare with it. I love the saying 'you do you' and if we can teach our kids that we are supporting empathy and understanding that everyone is different and that is ok :)

I find that siblings fight no matter what you do. You can't force anyone to love someone whether they are blood related or not. But something that often unites any two warring parties is a separate, common enemy. I'm not saying make up a reason to be mean to your kids so they can bond over hating you, but maybe give them a reason to protect each other. Maybe tie their chores in together. If they don't do them together without fighting, then neither kid gets allowance. Or something like that. Eventually, they will find enough adversity in the world for this to happen naturally, but this is just might be a way to give them a little nudge.

Some siblings are like oil and water together. It is just their personality that seems to clash.

I have 2 grandsons that love each other dearly, but you could never tell by how they act together. When they are with the 3rd brother, the fighting is barely existent. But when these particular 2 boys are around each other at home or in the car, watch out! Sparks fly as well as other items. Arguments abound, and many times tears flow.

The natural parental response is to separate the 2. However, the boys then ask to be together again after a time-out, and the fighting starts again. We have concluded that they like to fight with each other. It is annoying for the parents, but the boys don't seem to mind too much in the long run.

Do you think your kids really dislike each other, or is fighting more of their sibling way to relate?

If they genuinely seem to love each other deep down, you can rest assured that their bond is still strong and that this may be a phase they are going through.

I also would be interested in hearing others' responses to learn how to deal with the constant fighting.

I think to some extent fighting and disagreement is normal for all siblings. Younger children are more possessive for their belongings and more demanding when it comes to getting something. So, at this age they tend to make more fuss. As they grow older, they learn to control their emotions, or at least express their feelings without directly confronting others. Mostly kids get over their fights as they grow older.
There are few things that might help you in getting some peace of mind. Make sure that both of them have a specific time dedicated to themselves, because sometimes siblings only need some break from each other. Talk to them and discuss their disruptive behavior so they can make conscious efforts to make things better. You should have some laid down rules for the family, such as no screaming or throwing in house. You can also model the desired manners and peaceful ways of resolving differences.
I once thought that my kids will never become good siblings, but they have grown into a lovely duo of brother and sister.
Keep going, things will end up fine. Best of luck.